I've always thought of lube as something for handjobs or anal, or for if your vagina isn't wet enough--as a way to compensate for dryness, in one way or another. I figured, my pussy gets plenty wet, so for regular PIV sex or fingering, there's no need for lube.
Well, there's no need, but boy does it make a difference. Lube doesn't just bridge the gap between "ow" and "yum," but between "yum" and "OH YES OH GOD OH FUCK." You can think your sex is totally soaking wet and working fine, then add some lube and realize what you've been missing. I don't even fully understand it, but I'm coming to accept that it's true. Wet sex is good, but lubey wet sex is GREAT.
I am a big fan of lube.
ReplyDeleteI've been saying this for *years*. The most common dismissal I hear is "I don't *need* lube, I'm plenty wet already!" Silly, prideful crap - usually coming from someone who considers herself the most sexual/experienced/awesome lady in the room.
ReplyDeleteLadies, your vagina's capacity to produce lubrication is not a measure of your value as a sexual being, any more than pure dick-measuring is a measure of a man.
Use lube. It makes everything better. Trust me, I'm anonymous on the internet.
(Holly, you're awesome. From: a new fan.)
I don't think it's "prideful" to think you don't need lube. A woman's natural lubrication is made for sex, and if a girl makes so much of it that it's all over her thighs and the bed then why would she think she needed anything extra?
ReplyDeleteWhat these folks may not realize is that a woman's natural lubrication is water-based so it's a little more "squeaky" than, say, silicone...which is pure slide. Although after the act the slipperiness becomes annoying and it's practically impossible to wash off. :P
Really? I LOVE silicone lube, it's AMAZING. I never have any problem with it washing off - just apply soap first, then water. That helps. Though the stuff I use actually seems to absorb rather nicely after the fact.
ReplyDeleteI love lube because I'm really, really dry. :(
I don't like silicone lube because it gets everywhere and stays around forever, but even water-based lubes still make sex much awesomer.
ReplyDeleteAnon here. (Figured I'd get a sockpuppet account if I'm planning on hanging out here regularly.)
ReplyDeletePerverseCowgirl: I'm saying it's prideful to reject any awesome option just because you think you're already as awesome as it gets. It sounds to me like a boy saying "I don't need *toys* or my *hands* or *tongue*, I'm wielding the Magic Stick in my pants."
My current favorite water-based lube (for PIV) is Colt. Nice balance of slippery, staying power, and easy wash-off - and it doesn't have the mildly astringent effect that many water-based lubes seem to have on microtears and abrasions.
For heavy female ejaculators, I find silicone lubes are the way to go; I'll agree that the "I'm still slippery" feeling you keep for the next 12-24 hours (even after the shower) is a matter of personal preference.
Anonymous Hand: Colt comes in water-based? I've only ever seen it in a silicone version...it's what I use when I'm violating my bf's ass. It works better than anything else I've ever used (which admittedly is, like, three different brands of water-based stuff).
ReplyDeleteIt sounds to me like a boy saying "I don't need *toys* or my *hands* or *tongue*, I'm wielding the Magic Stick in my pants."
Except not really...not to me, anyway. Your Magic Stick example is about a guy insisting on using his penis rather than things that function completely differently from a penis (different shape, different level of dexterity, vibration, rotation, etc.), whereas the lube example is about a woman who refuses to use something that does (as far as she knows) exactly what her body does already.
-perversecowgirl
Some people really just prefer it without lube. Not because we think we're as awesome as it gets, but because we simply have a different idea about what awesome is/feels like.
ReplyDeleteAlso, what perversecowgirl said.
My first girlfriend had trouble getting wet, but of course we were too inexperienced to understand that. Sex with other women has been much more satisfying, and if she's having sex I hope she's discovered lube.
ReplyDeleteTo add my 2c into the lube/no lube discussion - I guess I've accidentally stumbled into much thicker lubes than other people, but I don't think the viscosity of vaginal lubrication and lube can compare. Lube is just way thicker, more viscous and just makes stuff better. And even if I'm soaking wet, I still prefer adding lube. It's just... well, more lubricative. :P
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm alone in liking sex that hurts a little. :)
ReplyDelete-Katie
I remember using water based lube while having unprotected sex with my boyfriend, and it made me feel exactly the way I feel when he has a condom on. I'd rather feel the texture of his skin inside me, even if the lube makes everything more wet inside.
ReplyDelete-Rux