tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post4528920362848725002..comments2024-03-22T05:55:48.117-04:00Comments on The Pervocracy: Cosmocking! December '11! Part Two!Cliff Pervocracyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02080142422250604406noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-69047260271176158972012-08-22T23:55:59.596-04:002012-08-22T23:55:59.596-04:00"Or maybe your video will come out looking li..."Or maybe your video will come out looking like Sasquatch fucking the Chupacabra, and for some reason there's a cheesecloth in front of them."<br /><br />OMG, that sounds like something the Cinema Snob would review. Wait, that sounds like something the Cinema Snob HAS reviewed!<br /><br />@Elle: SCIENCE!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-56776892946021442312012-06-23T12:53:25.096-04:002012-06-23T12:53:25.096-04:00I know I'm a year late to the party, but in th...I know I'm a year late to the party, but in the name of science, I feel I should point out that the original study (misquoted by Cosmo) said that french women spend 'almost 20%' of their 'clothing budget' (NOT INCOME!) on lingerie.<br /><br />They gave a figure of around 100 euro's spending a year, which is less than 0.3% of the figure you give for median income.<br /><br />Suddenly the study doesn't seem so remarkable....Ellenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-721112288078292202012-03-25T04:03:38.340-04:002012-03-25T04:03:38.340-04:00How sad is it that people looked at the cover and ...How sad is it that people looked at the cover and took it at face value?<br />(well, it's sad for Cosmo, LOL)Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10352414787767181946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-11418330160418268282011-12-30T16:46:02.660-05:002011-12-30T16:46:02.660-05:00Wow. On the fake cover, she look sort of like a hu...Wow. On the fake cover, she look sort of like a human. I mean, her waistline is too high and for her J cups, but her neck is facing upwards with her head, and she even has a bit of underarm flab! Not a fan of the doll makeup, though.Zoe Otaku3https://www.blogger.com/profile/18203038892559830198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-32380741657729708542011-12-01T23:04:55.640-05:002011-12-01T23:04:55.640-05:00My problem as a male in his 30's is I have rec...My problem as a male in his 30's is I have recently noticed my libido has decreased. I am struggling with impotence.<br /> I am currently dating someone who is an attractive nice women but she has a higher sex drive than me.<br />As much as Cosmo magazine has thankfully allowed women to express their sexuality, there needs to be a magazine or blog to help men who are struggling with impotence or a diminished sex drive.It seems like after 18 men's sex drive diminishes while women after 18 increase.<br />Many men these days are struggling with diminished sex drive or impotence.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-47915273326059338892011-11-29T02:18:15.153-05:002011-11-29T02:18:15.153-05:00I really want to get in on this "does it boun...I really want to get in on this "does it bounce?" thing. The penis becomes erect through the increase of the flow of blood, and blood flows to the penis by pulsing through blood vessels. From what I've seen, in the process of becoming erect, the penis rises and falls (slightly) with each pulsation, and it appears to bounce until it is fully erect.Carla Schmidt Hollowayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12947846629735463824noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-1631499930357804902011-11-28T16:38:16.398-05:002011-11-28T16:38:16.398-05:00American, and mostly new-yorkers, I think, (I don&...<i>American, and mostly new-yorkers, I think, (I don't read enough magazine to know for sure) because they are so much more trendy than us. </i><br /><br />I know this really means the City, but I find it hilarious anyway because I'm a New Yorker, and I'm sitting here reading this while wearing a ratty college sweatshirt and bleach-stained jeans, with sawdust in my hair. STYLE, I HAS IT.aebhelnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-77683177560116123452011-11-28T06:19:00.643-05:002011-11-28T06:19:00.643-05:00I know clothes in France are expensive but that...I know clothes in France are expensive but that's crazy!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-3483522994182813502011-11-28T03:45:24.120-05:002011-11-28T03:45:24.120-05:00"I wonder who French magazines cite to make t..."I wonder who French magazines cite to make their readers feel inferior."<br /><br />American, and mostly new-yorkers, I think, (I don't read enough magazine to know for sure) because they are so much more trendy than us. <br />And we make jokes about Belgians to feel superior. ^^Kyrienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-19336981389080579392011-11-27T23:12:29.878-05:002011-11-27T23:12:29.878-05:00Shame and Guilt: Anyone notice the big purple circ...Shame and Guilt: <em>Anyone notice the big purple circle on the cover? I point this out because this is possibly the weirdest idea ever on a Cosmo cover: after all, isn't EVERY cosmo a 'Shame and Guilt Issue!'???1??!!11!? </em><br /><br />If you look closer, it's clearly a parody. Note that the title of the magazine is "Overanalyzing".Brinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18034585577015417306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-65857178940600818792011-11-27T21:11:42.096-05:002011-11-27T21:11:42.096-05:00@Mihiraku -- I sincerely doubt it. I rather suspec...@Mihiraku -- I sincerely doubt it. I rather suspect he probably hasn't even had much in the way of dates after the 7 years with me...Maggienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-47062349976398476122011-11-27T17:45:56.683-05:002011-11-27T17:45:56.683-05:00So....
Anyone notice the big purple circle on the ...So....<br />Anyone notice the big purple circle on the cover? I point this out because this is possibly the weirdest idea ever on a Cosmo cover: after all, isn't EVERY cosmo a 'Shame and Guilt Issue!'???1??!!11!?Shame & Guiltnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-34257005354528124922011-11-27T16:53:10.216-05:002011-11-27T16:53:10.216-05:00@Anonymous: in Cosmospeak, "estimated" m...@Anonymous: in Cosmospeak, "estimated" means "we made this shit up".<br /><br />I can never decide whether they're just spewing out random stuff in order to meet deadlines, or whether they have some kind of betting pool to see what crazyness they can get away with. It's like Post-Feminist Poe'ing.mythagohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07138471078836187498noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-29841508155242893682011-11-27T15:00:44.896-05:002011-11-27T15:00:44.896-05:00Another Frenchie agreeing with anonymous here: I t...Another Frenchie agreeing with anonymous here: I think 3100 euros is the median for combined households, i.e. at least 2 persons in most cases. And I'll be damned if my fellow citizens spend 20% of their income on bloody(no pun intended) underwear... where are they taking their statistics from, exactly?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-15614958733358245672011-11-27T09:13:36.485-05:002011-11-27T09:13:36.485-05:00I knew I've seen that somewhere before
http:/...I knew I've seen that somewhere before<br /><br />http://www.cracked.com/funny-4420-advice-about-relationships/<br /><br />Great comedy website, I would recommend it. If you're looking for more Cosmocking:<br /><br />http://www.cracked.com/article/156_7-sex-tips-from-cosmo-that-will-put-you-in-hospital/<br /><br />http://www.cracked.com/article_19066_7-psychotic-pieces-relationship-advice-from-cosmo.html<br /><br />Of course, I love this website too, cosmocking or not!AlexWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15787334303629870521noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-87417886575318613452011-11-27T03:43:43.910-05:002011-11-27T03:43:43.910-05:00I'm really surprised that you didn't comme...I'm really surprised that you didn't comment on their article on how everyone should be having werewolf sex. I also thought it was funny that in this issue they gave a guy allowing you to pay for dinner as a reason for why he's not boyfriend material, when in the last few issues they told girls that you should pay sometimes.<br />Anyway, I wanted to say that I really enjoy your whole blog, and especially the Cosmocking. Your Cosmocking inspired me to write an essay on Cosmo's portrayal of gender roles for my sociology class. <br />Thank you so much for posting.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-2360799458351446512011-11-26T23:16:49.322-05:002011-11-26T23:16:49.322-05:00Holly, did you notice the purpoted link between be...Holly, did you notice the purpoted link between belly fat and anorgasmia?Hershele Ostropolernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-53180720334813294202011-11-26T20:04:42.010-05:002011-11-26T20:04:42.010-05:00Oh Cosmo.Oh Cosmo.Ashleyhttp://loveashley.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-32371488966848943152011-11-26T18:28:19.356-05:002011-11-26T18:28:19.356-05:00This isn't the first time Cosmo has proposed m...This isn't the first time Cosmo has proposed making a sex tape but sabotaging it so you can't see anything. I believe one of the earlier articles actually said "Have a camera there, but don't turn it on."<br /><br />I guess what you're supposed to do is set it up and pretend you're making a sex tape, and then afterward you giggle and say "Oops, we forgot to turn the camera on!", and you've indulged your partner's fantasy about being a porn performer and getting to fuck Sasha Grey* without <i>you actually being a porn performer</i>** and therefore anywhere on the Sasha Grey axis of slutitude. It fits into the broader Cosmo genre of "How to get the peripheral benefits of being slutty without being a slut, because sluts are gross."<br /><br />Which is to say that you've maneuvered him into fucking you while thinking about an imaginary person who looks like you but is more sexually adventurous.*** I don't see how this can be good for a relationship, and when this guy leaves you because he's tired of being jerked around, I'll eat a slice of <a href="http://whatever.scalzi.com/2006/09/26/how-to-make-a-schadenfreude-pie/" rel="nofollow">schadenfreude pie</a> just for you.<br /><br /><br />* who I believe is retired now, but still iconic enough that I can reference her<br /><br />** even though professional porn is an industrial product ruled by genre conventions and the constraints of camera placement, and has about as much relation to making a private sex tape as the McRib has to a Memphis pulled pork sandwich<br /><br />*** or maybe not more, but <i>differently</i>--maybe there's all kinds of freaky stuff you'd like to do, but Cosmo has talked you into making a fake sex tape instead, which is kind of sadMark Z.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-84560980803921467332011-11-26T18:08:55.799-05:002011-11-26T18:08:55.799-05:00Someone at Cosmo met a man once who didn't lik...Someone at Cosmo met a man once who didn't like nipple stimulation. Therefore, Men hate nipple stimulation. QEDAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-58766770114958184342011-11-26T17:05:27.788-05:002011-11-26T17:05:27.788-05:00Holly - Oh, I know not everyone likes nipples, but...Holly - Oh, I know not everyone likes nipples, but Cosmo's total silence on them, especially in contrast to their love of balls, makes me think they consider the idea of nipple stimulation unmanly.<br /><br />-LilaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-41894282828428499082011-11-26T15:18:19.002-05:002011-11-26T15:18:19.002-05:00It's the 'at the sight of her' part of...It's the 'at the sight of her' part of that line that confused me. The way it's phrased makes it sound as if the penis has its own eyeball.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-15244965221769568752011-11-26T13:18:07.403-05:002011-11-26T13:18:07.403-05:00Lila - Male nipples are really variable. Some peo...Lila - Male nipples are really variable. Some people I know are like "oh my god I could come just from that" and some people are like "eh, you might as well be twiddling my elbow." To do the nipple thing, you'd have to <i>ask</i>, and heavens forbid.<br /><br />...Then again, guys' feelings about their balls are pretty diverse too. But I guess Cosmo just decided to ignore that one.Cliff Pervocracyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02080142422250604406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-56942634525934395192011-11-26T13:10:07.504-05:002011-11-26T13:10:07.504-05:00" Or maybe your video will come out looking l..." Or maybe your video will come out looking like Sasquatch fucking the Chupacabra, and for some reason there's a cheesecloth in front of them."<br /><br />I really and truly lol'ed at that one. Great 'mocking, as always! :DArgylehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05853707297405847200noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2770580070906411828.post-25426704602646525822011-11-26T12:46:40.816-05:002011-11-26T12:46:40.816-05:00I can't believe someone beat me to mentioning ...I can't believe someone beat me to mentioning that "bouncing happily" sounds like his penis is actually a hyperactive little puppy. <br /><br />Also I can't speak for the bepenised half of the population, but really, a hot water bottle in the pubic area sounds more like "oh god what do I do about these period cramps" and less like a sexy sex game...f.noreply@blogger.com