I think I'd have a lot more interest in the swinging community if it wasn't called "swinging." Because I love the idea of fucking around a lot with other people's partners, but the name makes me worry that there will be guys with gold chains in their chest hair who want to call me a "groovy bird."
Yo, toots, whatsamatta wit' bein' called a groovy bird? 'S like a guy can't give you a compliment. You's one uptight tomater.
ReplyDeleteI thought it was just me who felt this way.
ReplyDeleteIt makes me think of playgrounds, personally!
ReplyDeleteMy problem is that I swing dance, and I wouldn't want to get confused... *g*
ReplyDeleteYES! Exactly!
DeleteI kind of want to do a themed halloween costume with my wife of "Two wild and crazy guys" - I figure it'll be a good way to bring up the topic in public and get away with it.
ReplyDelete"Come on foxes, lets swing."
"Haha, yeah."
"Oh we're totally serious. No backsies!"
I'd have more interest in the "swinging" community if they weren't generally hostile towards bi men.
ReplyDeleteIt seems to be a "straight men, straight or bi (and preferably bi) women only" community in most areas.
Hey baby, what's your sign?
ReplyDelete@ Not Me:
ReplyDeleteIt's like that around here (eastern Mass) too. My friends who run the large local swinger parties are very tolerant (and also bdsm-friendly, going so far as to rent me one of their two party locations -- a building on their home property,no less -- for a bdsm party, for well under what they would've made for a swinger party), but the community as a whole is freaked out by bi males, whereas being bi as a woman is pretty much like counting as five-thirds of a person. The few bi male swingers I know mostly keep it quiet fromall but their closest (swinger) friends.
[...] the community as a whole is freaked out by bi males
ReplyDeleteI wonder, if male bisexuality had the same sort of cultural "hotness" as female bisexuality, would we see a lot more otherwise straight guys explore at least the trappings of bisexuality?
It seems to be a "straight men, straight or bi (and preferably bi) women only" community in most areas.
ReplyDeleteWell, that and only a subset of straight men. Everything I've experienced reinforces the idea that I'm not welcome there on my own merits, but maybe they'll tolerate my presence if I bring some woman along as my "ticket." Squick.
I wonder, if male bisexuality had the same sort of cultural "hotness" as female bisexuality, would we see a lot more otherwise straight guys explore at least the trappings of bisexuality?
ReplyDeleteI'm gonna say yes. The goth community tends to be much more pro-genderbending and pro-boy/boy than other social cliques, and (coincidentally?) there are a lot of barsexual dudes to be found. Probably more genuinely bi dudes, too.
(Barsexual: someone who'll make out with people of the same sex, but only in a bar or other public venue for the purpose of titillating onlookers.)
btw I've always hated the word "swinging", too, probably for the same reasons as Holly. My partner and I have discussed the idea of playing with other couples and are theoretically okay with it (maybe, kind of, someday...) - and it wouldn't be "poly" because we don't want outside relationships, just the physical stuff - but goddamn I so can't call it "swinging".
ReplyDeleteIt probably doesn't help that I was at an acquaintance's house once (years and years ago) and found a swinger magazine there. this was basically a big book of personal ads from couples looking for other couples to swap with - and there were a lot of pictures. The men were very much chest-hair-and-gold-chainy and the women all seemed to be in submissive "I'm offering myself up as an object so come and get me" poses. It wigged the fuck out of me.
I dunno. "Swinger" is how my stepdaughter identifies herself, and as she's in an open marriage, I guess it fits so long as it works for her.
ReplyDelete