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Monday, January 31, 2011

Cock.

Man I love strapping on a cock. It's not that I am or want to be a guy, just that it's nice to have the option from time to time. There's something fundamentally pleasing and satisfying, even comforting, about having a nice chunky piece of sexual equipment filling up my pants.

(I've always felt like this comic describes a fun way to be.)

It's not about dominance either, by the way. Having a cock does not make you automatically the top, as quite a few boys I know could tell you. I have had my cock ridden by a guy who was holding me down.

And I love having a boyfriend who is nearly as enthused as I am about the whole subject. He has a little hesitancy about the physical implications of playing with my cock, which is understandable, but not about the "oh no, if I enjoy having sex with a girl, but it's the wrong kind of sex, then that's like gay sex, which might make me gay, which would be terrible."

Then again, I'm amazed at the things Rowdy actually enjoys that in other relationships I would hope to "get away with" at best. Sexual perversion, of course, but also my enduring lack of competence or enthusiasm in the realm of femininity. Finding out that he actually thinks I look good with no makeup in cargo pants, rather than just putting up with it when I'm too "lazy" to get into drag proper feminine attire, is such a "you can have chocolate every day" feeling. Also, farting: not a dealbreaker. (Don't laugh; "girls don't fart" is a fucking issue. God knows how many belly cramps we've suffered holding it in over the years.)

Last night Rowdy and I were watching porn and cuddling and he was alternating between stroking my cock and playing with my pussy, and all I could think was, shit, what the hell deodorant should I be wearing?

10 comments:

  1. Super jealous of your fabulous boyfriend. That is all.

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  2. The brand Sure has an unscented deodorant (white tube with green label) that I really like and use regularly. I particularly like it because I can be unstinky by using the deodorant, but still smell the way I _want_ by applying my favorite perfume. I hate hate hate the way scented deodorants and shampoos and hair products and etc. all compete for my nasal attention. I don't wear perfume everyday, but I have a couple I like enough that when I wear them I don't want it drowned out and mixed in with all the other cheap shit smells from what amounts to cleaning supplies.

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  3. I hate that "girls don't fart" business. It's one of those things where I know the guys I'm with don't care (as my current fuckbuddy said about my hairy armpits, "if I cared, I wouldn't be here) but I still feel terrible about it.

    I really, really, really want a Feeldoe. Someone should get me one for Christmas.

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  4. LOL @ DEODORANT!
    Also I love your conflating "feminine attire" with the idea of drag. Nice touch.

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  5. Forget belly cramps - how about gas pains that hurt so bad you wanna curl up and die? Sorry, I'm not being in pain to compensate for your precious sensibilities. Everyone Farts. Deal with it.

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  6. I don't really know a lot of men who think girls don't fart in public. The men I do know who might think that are seriously no prizes on other grounds anyway.

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  7. Mousie - Everyone knows that girls fart, just like everyone knows that girls grow hair on their legs. The problem is more people saying that a woman farting "ruins the mystery" or is intolerably crude.

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  8. Don't laugh; "girls don't fart" is a fucking issue.

    Most of my partners haven't been too prissy about my bodily functions. My current bf is by far the best of all, though. I never knew it was even possible to feel this comfortable with someone. I have pooped while he was in the room, yo.

    As far as I'm concerned, the less we think of the opposite sex as a different species, the better. Adhering to strict gender roles means that men sometimes have to pretend to be stronger or less emotional than they really are and women sometimes have to pretend we're not even humans with bodily functions. Ridiculous. Count me out.

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  9. @perversecowgirl, Word. Up. Homes.

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  10. "I have had my cock ridden by a guy who was holding me down."
    Do you want girls like me to spontaneously come after reading and then die from envy or is it a nice side-benefit?

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