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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

I suppose the damage is done.

Alan and I are, because of this blog, probably No More.

Dammit.

I'm not sure. Probably I shouldn't be posting this or leaving the blog up. But sadly, I just don't think that liking someone as a person compensates for a total failure to meet their sexual expectations. It fucking sucks and I'm completely heartbroken but I guess in some sense it was inevitable. I'm a huge horrible pervert, he's not, and much as I want to say "it's just sex, what about us?" I have a feeling that the answer is "okay, us aren't meant to be having sex."

Dammit.

8 comments:

  1. Bruno is sad, but cannot help imagining Brandon outside your house, dressed in black latex and holding a stereo over his head to serenade you with something by The Cramps.

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  2. What a pity, and how sad. I don't understand how a great relationship with a vanilla-tending boy who was okay with your being poly could suddenly fall apart about your getting your kink elsewhere, as long as you were being safe. Perhaps I'm a bit too poly positive, but I think "my sweetie and her 'Hitter'" would probably be a fun thing. I feel sorry that you lost something that was obviously (in the aggregate) wonderful for you both.

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  3. It's an unfair world, Holly.
    I'm really sorry for you.

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  4. I hope you're able to work it out- I understand if he's upset by what he may see as dissing his sexual prowess- but in my opinion you've always been pretty respectful and clear about having different expectations of him. I suppose it must sting to read what can be interpreted as "the sex is meh"- but you still might be able to fix it if you want to.

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  5. Aww. Holly I'm so sorry! That really does suck.

    Though, I have to say, as a pervy woman, that *loves* my kink, and loves sex - for me - it NEVER works out with men that don't like the same kind of sex I do. No matter how well we click, no matter how great everything else is, if the sex isn't there.. well.. for me it's a huge deal, it's a deal breaker in fact, that's all there is to it.

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  6. Oh boy... I so know where you're coming from Holly, more than I dare admit on my blog, haha...

    Go and have a cry. I'll come and join you if you like ;)

    mia
    xx

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  7. To each his/her own, I guess.

    I wish more people put less emphasis on sex, though. To most people I know, it's more or less all that matters, and try as I might, I get disgusted by it. It would be so nice to be able to mutually appreciate someone as a person without having sex intrude and complicate things.

    As far as intimacy goes, forget the kinky sex and so forth. I would so much rather just lay close to someone, cuddle, talk or watch a movie or something.

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