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| The Dreaded Bunny Flogger. It still counts. |
The truth is, he bit me a little bit and then fingered me while I rubbed his dick. Then we went to sleep.
Even as I write this, I feel like self-justifying, like telling you about the times I've gotten my skin stapled or been locked in a dog cage or flogged on a St. Andrew's cross or triple-fisted by satyrs or whatever exactly happened at that barbecue. I gotta keep my cred! Can't be a prude, can't be a poser! Gotta let you know I'm real, I have real sex and do serious BDSM!
What a load of horseshit that attitude is. There's no objective definition of these things, no standard you need to measure up to. Your own pleasure and your partner's should be the only things that matter. If you don't get pleasure from being the sexiest and the naughtiest and the edgiest, that's okay.
Kinky snobbery isn't just irrational, it's dangerous. When your guideline stops being "what will make me feel good?" and starts being "what will prove my sexuality is genuine?", you're liable to do things that don't make you feel good. You're also vulnerable to manipulation from people who try to convince you that if you were really kinky you'd XYZ with them, or people who say you're not having "real sex" because they want to rush you into intercourse. And there's the danger of skipping negotiation and safewords (or worse, not taking safewords seriously) because you don't think a certain type of light play is "real" enough to need them.
Here's some things that can be real sex:
• Phone sex
• Mutual masturbation (I never know if this means "wanking each other" or "wanking in front of each other," but, eh, either way)
• Dry humping
• Wet humping
• Sharing fantasies
• BDSM play without genital contact
• Particularly intense kissing
• Literally anything you and your partner agree is real sex for you
And here's some things that can be real BDSM:
• Gentle spanking during sex
• Tying up just for the tying, without hitting or fucking
• Getting someone's drinks for the evening
• Teasing with a feather, a finger, or, yes, The Dreaded Bunny Flogger
• Playing the role of a servant, puppy, Girl Scout, etc., but doing nothing physically intimate while in role
• Sending pervy emails and IMs
• Getting hit just once or twice and not wanting/needing more than that
• ...sigh... toilet paper bondage.
• Literally anything you and your partner agree is real BDSM for you
There are some distinctions within BDSM that do matter. Socially-acceptable BDSM (i.e., playing with an ice cube) is not the same as you-could-get-arrested BDSM (i.e., bloodplay), and bedroom or online BDSM are not the same as being in the meatspace BDSM community. It's important to remember that experience and expertise don't translate well across these divisions. But none of the divisions of Kinkland are "better," and all of them are really kinky.
I want to take back all the times I yelled at Cosmo, "That's not kinky!" What I should have been yelling is "That's kinky, but it's really irresponsible!"
very true. i've just learned my own lessons about this same matter. better put by a friend who said:
ReplyDeleteif "the community," is going to look down on "vanilla" society as a rule, said community is going to need to offer some kind of incentive to join it, other than smug self-justification. People in "the lifestyle" love to claim that it's their kinks, etc. which drove their "vanilla" lovers/spouses/friends/family away, but if you've ever initiated a breakup, then you know about letting someone down easy, viz. "It's not your kink that drove me away; it's the fact that it's literally all you care about," becomes something more palatable and easy-to-rationalize and twist in hindsight. Sure, dangerous, irresponsible behavior shows up at every level of society. Given the nature of what we do, though, I'm deeply, deeply uncomfortable when such dangerous and irresponsible behavior shows up in the track record of someone in whom we'd put an enormous amount of trust, e.g. in a potentially injurious or life-threatening scene.
Brilliant as usual! Today me and the Domly one fucked, no pain, no beatings, no ropes, role play or approved positions, was it D/s? Hell yes...would 10000 twue Doms tell us otherwise? Of course, but quite frankly the fact they think we are doing it wrong is a badge of honour.
ReplyDeleteI read a post tonight on a leather site that talked of BDSM tourists, and how they would be kind enough to not mock them, thankfully before bed i have also read this, restoring my belief their are sane kinksters out there.
I have a problem with BDSM tourists that objectify kinksters--i.e., invading players' personal space, interrupting scenes, making fun of unusual kinks, creepy-staring at kinksters.
DeleteBut the objectification is the real problem, and it's important to remember that. If someone doesn't play, but is respectful, I have no problem with that kind of "tourism."
Wouldn't a respectful "BDSM tourist" just be a...voyeur??
DeleteNo, I don't think so. I mean, for me, a voyeur gets off on watching, just as an exhibitionist gets off on being watched. I might watch folk play for informational or educational purposes, or because they're my friends and I want them to be happy, but I don't get off on it ever. Not that I'd be accused of tourism either, but you get my point.
DeleteI think a respectful BDSM tourist is the equivalent of a respectful real-world tourist; they take an interest in a culture and its ways, observe the expected behaviour while there, whilst not being ready (or perhaps inclined) to participate and fully enter the culture. That said, they may take some of what they picked up home with them, whether that's a new favourite dish or music (for real tourism) or, you know, spankings (for BDSM tourism).
I kind of like this metaphor. I'm a sucker for a good extended metaphor. You don't have to become a citizen of "BDSM Country" to enjoy the culture. You can read about it, watch movies about it. Take vacations there. Some people are tourists. Other people have a summer home. I think we have a time share.
DeleteIt is the calling of anyone who doesnt fit with your BDSM view a torist that gets me, like term wanabbe, as if there is some exam you pass that qualifies you for acceptance. The piece I read wasn't talking about rude people (and all the things you describe fall under that so we don't need another word) but people new to BDSM and unfamiliar with what they believed to be vital conventions.
ReplyDeletePersonally I am not a fan of the whole I can only play in public if enya is playing and the whole world treats it as a sacred moment idea, if you are into what is happening then things cease to matter. Blaming others for distracting you is rather like a lover blaming you for not orgasming, it takes two! That said basic good manners in any situation are taught as children, don't point, stare or pass comment on the behaviour of others, not really rocket science.
Blaming others for distracting you is rather like a lover blaming you for not orgasming, it takes two!
DeleteEr, no. If I'm deep in my headspace and some buttface wanders by and makes loud rude comments about my body or stands so close my top has to push them away, it is not my fault for reacting to them. It's totally the buttface's fault.
I mean, yes, people who demand perfect settings for their play should probably just play in private or with selected well-coached friends, but let's not get all "it gets two to tango" about buttfacery.
Agreeing with Cliff here. There are people who demand things be perfect for their scenes but there are also a lot of people who interrupt and invade your space while playing. The difference between other people playing loudly or the music being irritating and people interrupting a scene directly by walking right up and starting to make comments or get within the strike zone of a toy is not okay (don't get me started on people who want to join a scene already in progress, I'm in favor of tossing anyone who does that out of the event).
DeleteRight...where does one get a Dreaded Bunny Flogger?
ReplyDeleteSecond down on this page:
Deletehttp://www.detailstoys.com/low_inten_floggers.html
It's pricey, but I have two DeTails floggers and I know their stuff is quality.
To get one cheaper you'd probably have to go to a BDSM convention/vendor fair in person, or ask around your local scene. I know both of those are ridiculously inconvenient, but this is a pretty specialty item. :/
You could probably make one yourself too: there are instructions for rope floggers on fetlife, it wouldn't be too difficult to modify for the Dreaded Bunny Flogger if you're handy with a sewing needle.
DeleteThis is the main drawback of labels. They're useful to help explain to people what we're into and who we are without having to go into lots of detail but then people start to try and stick us all into boxes based on those labels (and we ourselves). Further complicated when everyone has different definitions for the same labels.
ReplyDeleteWe face a lot of those problems in the gay community, people get all up in arms about someone who identifies as 'lesbian' sleeping with a man. Suddenly they've been lying to everyone about who they are, have betrayed their community and often their friends because they decided they wanted a penis one day. Nothing has changed about who and what they are, they still love women and want to be involved with women but because of a label they're now excluded from their community, ostracised and ignored.
Labels should be a place to start a discussion, not the be all and end all of the discussion.
One of my standard lines for introductory bondage workshops is call my demo bunny over and ask them to hold something and stay there - very politely and casually at the start of the spiel and then a few minutes in point out that what I've done is bondage. Using the situation and the good manners of my bunny to restrain them is just as much 'bondage' as using giant swathes of chain or rope. If I time it right after they've had a lot of water to drink - I can use their not wanting to interrupt while I'm presenting a workshop to make it predicament bondage. A feather can be just as kinky as the whole chicken if you use it right.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm just having fun imagining what one could do with a whole chicken...
DeleteI read this and thought about how phone sex has started to feel like a violation to me, because not only is it not negotiated, but it starts without me. In the middle of a conversation about our respective children, our day-to-day lives, or other very very non-sexy conversations, my partner will reveal by noises or comments that he has been jerking off quietly the whole time. I no longer participate, and will end conversations when I become aware of this, because it feels sort of rape-y, or at very least assholish.
ReplyDeleteEw. That is very inappropriate and boundary-violating.
DeleteSeconded. Seconded, seconded. That doesn't sound like a phone sex thing. That sounds like a violation of consent.
DeleteYeah, that is seriously disrespectful and dehumanizing. It is basically saying, "I really couldn't care less about the things we are talking about and that you value, all that matters about you is that you enable me to get off spanking it".
DeleteThat's not sort-of-rapey. That's as much rapey as phone sex is sex. And while you're talking about your KIDS, even? Ick-ick-ick-ick.
DeleteUgh. That is not phone sex. That's the equivalent of hiding in the bushes outside someone's window & wanking off to the sight of them eating dinner.
Deleteflightless
(In other words, YES, that is a violation.)
Deleteflightless
I wish all or even most people thought like you do.
ReplyDeleteThis post is really helpful to me. I have interest in BDSM and kinky play, but have always been rather turned-off of the "community" so to speak because of a fear (rational or not) that there would be too much pressure to be kinkier/edgier/etc, when really my tastes are only a bit kinkier than "vanilla." Knowing myself, I am VERY susceptible to those sorts of pressures, so my solution has been to not really delve into the local community (somehow, it's made even worse by the fact that the local community is so strong; I feel like there's nothing between 0 and 100). I have other kink-curious friends who feel the same way, and who also find it quite frustrating.
ReplyDeleteInterestingly (I think) I once played with someone who was weirded out and confused by the fact that bunny floggers are on my hard limits list. Apparently they were his go-to warm up toy, and he wasn't entirely sure what to do with me without them.
ReplyDelete(I have some weird neurological things going on, one of which means that light touch, like a bunny fur flogger, is horrendously painful and ooky in the bad way)
With the number of people who are allergic to rabbit fur (my partner is one, that's why it's on his limit list) you would think a top would have some alternative in place.
DeleteI quite literally laughed out loud at "...sigh... toilet paper bondage"
ReplyDeleteStill chuckling. Appreciating the rest of the post too.
Popping in again to say thank you, again, for the whole validation thing. Vanilla Boyfriend and I tried out some very basic restraining the other day (holding my arms behind my back while kissing, nothing more than that), and a very small, very silly part of me was shrilling, "You're not being kinky enough! How dare you consider yourself kinky? If you were really kinky you'd have toys and rope and shit." And that was ridiculous, because other than stupid brain voice being a mood killer, it was awesome. It was hot and I enjoyed it and Vanilla Boyfriend enjoyed it and we're gonna do it again and it was great... except for the little stupid brain voice saying, "Not kinky enough!"
ReplyDeleteYou know, as someone who has done some relatively edgy kinky shit (I've got a thing for volunteering to demo bottom), I'd like to point out that the hottest, kinkiest scenes I do lately are almost always done without anything but hands, teeth, bodies and words. Doing what turns me on works a lot better than making it look right.
DeleteI run into this BS all the time because I'm a bottom not a submissive. I can't count the number of times someone has asked my partner for permission to do something (he always answers "ask her, not me") or any number of other assumptions people have about a hetero kinky couple.
ReplyDeletePeople also assume because of the reputation my partner and I have that we always play really hard and it's all blood play and heavy impact all the time and that we always have kinky sex. In fact we often do light play and most of the sex we have is pretty light on BDSM is not vanilla (I rarely like combining BDSM and sex, they put me in very different head spaces).
My partner, Kinkstergeek, also has another play partner. The fact that their relationship doesn't involve sex (in fact they've never even kissed in nearly 3 years) really confuses people. Most people can wrap their heads around non-sexual play at public event (no one wonders why one of my favorite people to have a scene with would whip me when he's gay) but when people play in private there's an assumption it will involve sex.
BTW my best friend and her husband, while be wonderfully twisted people, have a vanilla relationship. My kinky friends have embraced them and making them welcome at the dinners they attend. That's why they are considered friends and not just people I know who are in the community.
*note* Most of the time I post here under my real name, since I'm writing about pretty personal beefs I have with the kink community I'm using my Fetlife name. I really should pick one or the other.
I actually gotta say, I felt like there's been times when you've said this Cliff, like when you've said people don't get to call themselves kinky til they've been stuffed with three dildos and smacked with studded gloves. It's the only part of your blog I've ever been "ehhh' about, everything else I love. This, now, too, I love!
ReplyDeleteEr, no. If I'm deep in my headspace and some buttface wanders by and makes loud rude comments about my body or stands so close my top has to push them away, it is not my fault for reacting to them. It's totally the buttface's fault.
ReplyDeleteBut that is covered by the term buttface, or as I said before rude twunt. Using words like vanilla and tourist to designate those who simpl dont live up to the ideal of kinky enough is what I object to.
"he bit me a little bit and then fingered me while I rubbed his dick."
ReplyDeleteThat sounded incredibly hot when I read it. :-)
The bunny flogger looks very cool. Does it actually hurt if you thwack someone with it hard, or is it too fluffy to hurt?
ReplyDeleteI would think it's more thumpy than stingy but I've never been beaten with one of those. I'm seriously considering making my own to find out though
DeleteI always describe mine as "It feels like getting hit with a hug!" Mine doesn't sting AT ALL, no matter how hard you swing, and while there's an impact it's more like a very downy pillow. Mostly I use it in tradeoff with my (real) flogger.
DeleteI really enjoy the part where you describe the different kinds of sex. As a person who suffers from vaginismus, I often feel very constrained by definitions of sex and virginity, and the constant condescending remarks and assumptions that "No penis has been all the way in my vagina" is actually the same as "I am joining a nunnery." It makes me feel very defensive about my sexy street cred, like my first instinct is to be like , "No! I'm totally sexual I've done all this crazy XYZ." Which is just frustrating, I shouldn't have to justify anything I do, Sex can be whatever feels like sex to us, just like BDSM can be whatever feels like BDSM.
ReplyDeleteWe can still criticise Cosmo and its ilk for using the wrong terminiology? Because whatever it is, putting your lacy thong on your nipples is not Bondage, Discipline, Domination, submission, Sadism or Masochism.
ReplyDeleteAlso, biting rules.
Putting your lacy thong on your nipples is (incredibly heavy sigh) probably "kinky" in some sense.
DeleteIt's totes not BDSM though, because dammit there's a line somewhere.
Like toilet paper bondage, probably kinky only if everybody is actually into it. I mean, if my partner put a lacy thong on his nipples in total seriousness, I would giggle so much and the mood would be ruined.
DeleteThat, or if it's a 'don't break this insanely fragile restraint' thing.
DeleteThat, or if it's a 'don't break this insanely fragile restraint' thing.
DeleteSure you can yell "That's not kinky". You can have a line, as long as you remember that it's... well, yours.
ReplyDeleteJust started following this blog, and didn't know where to jump in but... of everything I've read and seen so far... well dammit! This NAILS it!
DeleteNot to take away from the original post, which really sort of says the same thing, but that one word, bolded above, says all that anyone really needs to say.
Your kink is YOUR kink.
If it's edgeplay, cool. I've actually been witness and participant in some pretty awesome stuff, including scarification and branding and it was HOT. (D'uh... stupid pun, but I'll leave it.) But I've also experienced some of that, "...he bit me a little bit and then fingered me while I rubbed his dick." It had just as solid a place as that other stuff... and why not?
If it's as simple as a blindfold or wanting your wrists held while you're doing it missionary, hey, it's about what turns YOU on (unless you're doing it to turn on your dominant/top... which is a whole other discussion). It's about what gives you the sensations or the head trip YOU'RE looking for. Otherwise, you probably ought to give some serious thought to your motivations.
I guess that was sort of vehement for someone who's never posted here before, and sorry to storm into the house without introduction... but there ya go. It's the Interwebz.
Toilet paper bondage is not real bondage!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd I keep telling you, NOTHING happened at that barbecue. Nothing... at all.
And I... was never here. (closes Important-Looking High-Ranking Military Leader ID holder and takes the James Earl Jones voice elsewehere).
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ReplyDeleteThere's a quote that I just love in Tristan Taormino's The Ultimate Guide to Kink, in Patrick Califa's article on "Enhancing Masochism", which ironically gets into some reallllly heavy stuff.
ReplyDelete"Remember that the point of doing a scene is how it makes you feel, not the techniques or toys being used. A good top understands this, and won't throw a hissy if you need to be beaten with a terry-cloth bathrobe tie." or, ya know, a bunny flogger. *shudder*
Sums it up perfectly. We need more people who think like you. And like him, obviously.
Thank you, Cliff. My boyfriend and I have, over the course of our relationship (3 years so far)gone from being pretty much entirely vanilla to... something else. At the moment we're into pegging, slapping, spanking, and bondage. But we started out with plastic handcuffs and a little hair pulling, you know? And even if our sex life is getting increasingly BDSM-ey, we're still learning. And even though my boyfriend is probably primarily sub, we both function as switches, both for practical reasons and because we both really enjoy being dominant sometimes. So even though what we do in bed is not completely vanilla, it can be difficult to call it BDSM. I feel like in order to earn our BDSM cred, we have to have super rigid roles and be really serious about everything, when we're still just learning and goofing around! We don't know the terminology and we've never been to any kind of event. So it feels like we're excluded from both the "super cool kids BDSM club" and the "acceptable vanilla sex club".
ReplyDeleteHave I been posting here without realising it?
Delete" So it feels like we're excluded from both the "super cool kids BDSM club" and the "acceptable vanilla sex club"."
DeleteI totally get that.
Yeah. I can't talk to my super vanilla friends about kink except in very general terms. It suuuucks.
DeleteSome of the hottest bondage can consist of nothing more than a single thread tying the wrists together and an order not to break it no matter what.
ReplyDeleteYes! I've been in a very hot scene where we started playing spontaneously (in a car in a parking lot -- no toy bag in sight) and the bondage equipment was a hair-tie placed symbolically around the wrists.
Deleteflightless
I don't know... I think BDSM requires consent and negotiations to be "real" BDSM. I'm willing to draw that line. 'Cause without it, it's not BDSM... it's assault. So you're still welcome to make fun of Cosmo all you want.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm willing to go along with it's only kinky if you and your partner find it kinky to you, not because some magazine told you it's kinky and you need to do it for brownie points. So again, cosmock away. =)
I think BDSM requires consent and negotiations to be "real" BDSM. I'm willing to draw that line. 'Cause without it, it's not BDSM... it's assault.
DeleteThis is a good point.
Coming from the other side of this, thank you. It is really really sad to me when people apologize because oh, I'm sorry, I'm not as heavy a player as you. That's not a failing! It just means we're different people and like different things! This is not a competition!
ReplyDeleteMy name is Jay R., I'm a toilet paper mummy, and I'm kinky.
ReplyDeleteAAHH HAHAHAAHHAHAHHAHAHAAHAAA!! ::runs off to terrorize the neighborhood::
Actually, this was a fantastic post. I just have an incredible urge to snark at all times.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog post!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I just randomly stumbled upon this post. I identify as kink-friendly, but I'm honestly very hesitant to interact with the community because I've encountered assholes online who think that because I'm female, I must be a sub. Truth is, I'm not interested in submission at all. Actually, the thought of submitting to anyone kind of disgusts me (not that I find it disgusting in general, *I* just don't want to do it). On the other hand, I do fantasize about being Dominant, but then I start feeling kind of....guilty....because I have such a strong reaction to submission. It just seems like I'm being a big hypocrite.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, long story short, I'm definitely much more interested in sensation play than psych play, but I get discouraged because people say "Oh well, if you were *REALLY* kinky you'd be into psych play," and as I've said, I feel very ambivalent regarding D/s, and sometimes it seems as if some members of the community forget there are more letters in BDSM and kinky activities that don't fall under any of those letters. So thank you for writing this post! I'd like to plaster it all over the interwebs and make sure every kinkster reads it!
This was a neat comment because it made me think a bit. It seems really pointless to categorize people as kinky/not kinky. Really most people probably have a variety of things they like and don't and sure, some might skew more towards one end than the other but...why *can't* someone be a submissive sadist, or prefer missionary sex but also like roleplaying dirty talk or...whatever combination of things that are YES for them. Making into a binary makes no sense. If You Are Kinky You Like All These Things, and If You Are Vanilla You Like These Things. I know people who consider themselves vanilla but go crazy for really hard biting..is that kinky or not? Who gets to say?
DeleteI'm a dominant who is also a masochist. Boxes will never constrain me! :D Folks are into what they're into.
DeleteI'm far more into psych play than sensation play, and I find that people often assume I'm new to BDSM because I'm not a masochist and have a very low pain threshold. It doesn't take much to hurt me "enough," and that's how my partner and I like it. Folks write me off as an amateur or a tourist or--ugh--act all sympathetic about it. "Don't worry, you'll get there eventually," they like to say.
DeleteI don't need to get there! I am HERE, doing what I do! And I have been for a least a decade. :P
This is way late but I wanted to comment because this is almost exactly what I've been thinking. Submission - especially to psych stuff - terrifies me in a very visceral, not fun, not sexy way, and the kinksters I've met assume I'm submissive because I'm female, so I stay away from kink things. Sometimes I think I'd like to be dominant, just a little bit, but then I feel guilty because why should I make someone else do something I wouldn't do myself?
DeleteSo I guess this is my long-winded way of saying I feel you, and if you figure something out let us anons know. In the meantime, it's really refreshing that people like Cliff are talking about kink as more than just edgeplay.
your blogs are always thought-provoking, Cliff, but to top it off the comments are good, too! the last commenter made such a good point about kink/vanilla. enjoyable, as always :)
ReplyDeleteI was just having a moment of insecurity about this the other day. I needed this; thank you.
ReplyDeleteI admit I've always felt insecure about my own tastes, because I DO feel a lot of pressures about it. And sometimes this blog has unwittingly contributed to it. At one point I remember you mentioning something like, "Hair-pulling? Is that really kinky?" offhandedly somewhere, and I think you were joking, but I still felt awkward. Same with the snarky remarks I see in kink blogs about this snotty newcomers with their fuzzy collars and handcuffs who think they are the One Twu Kinky.
ReplyDeleteThese days, I just don't even talk about it. It's too sore.
I appreciate this post so much! It's timely. I've had a long time interest in kink, but only recently had the opportunity to start exploring it. I've always identified as a switch, but didn't have the faintest about how I'd ever manage to dominate someone and have it be positive and awesome for them, I *thought* I was much more interested in submitting. Turns out that I love dominating someone and giving them an awesome experience, and I don't need to put on any kind of airs or attitude, I can be myself - who is loving and sensual and kind, and also share amazing experiences with them, including hurting them awesomely if that's what they want. Also seems that I'm really choosy on who I'm willing to submit to and that's partly why I've not explored kink sooner. The attitudes about what is 'real' and not and who gets to be a 'real' dom or a 'real' sub made it so hard and impenetrable for me to feel anything other than a sense of deep terror at getting it wrong when I first started out. I'm still so self conscious even though I know it's all crap now. Posts like yours help.
ReplyDeleteLove this post! I went on a date with a physics grad student that I met on OkCupid a month ago last Saturday. We're both pretty kinky, so while the latter part of the date did have us making out, I asked him to bite my neck. He left about ten hickeys on my neck and when I needed a break, I had him pin my hands down while we made out. If this keeps going as well as it is, we'll probably get into harder stuff later.
ReplyDeleteI have a FetLife account that I rarely use. I have an interest in the scene, but haven't attended any munches due to time and transportation constraints. I haven't had many partners, much less ones I've felt comfortable admitting my fetishes to, so I don't have a lot of experience in BDSM. That doesn't make my experiences or my kinkiness any less valid and I feel a lot better hearing someone who's been in the scene for a while and whose blog I read regularly.
I have a question about differences in orgasms and biting. I was aroused, but I didn't come hard when he was biting me and grinding his thigh between my legs, despite the fact that I was making all of the noises that I usually make when I come. After he left, I checked and found that I was wet, but not dripping the way I usually am when I come satisfactorily. I could have gone for more. I just chalked it up to a need for more direct stimulation because I'd been masturbating every day before I had to go back to college with my electric toothbrush, but I'm not sure. Has something similar ever happened to you, Cliff? Awesome readers?
...the Bunny Flogger is absolutely adorable. (Also, wonderful post, Cliff.)
ReplyDeleteI loved this one too - I have just stumbled across a new blog that I completely adore - this one ! I love your writing !
ReplyDelete