One of my favorite positions to be in (actually having sex or just messin' around) is back to front. It's a selfish thing; I can't do anything for the guy but wiggle against him a little, and his hands can do anything to me. And it's a power thing. They teach you in martial arts that the worst position you can get into is facedown on the ground. If you're grappling and someone gets on top when you're faceup you've got a shot at bucking them, but if they get on your back you're fucked.
I like that feeling. Especially when a guy's not afraid to put his weight on me, even so much that it's a little hard to breathe. Especially when he's got my hands, stretched out in front or pulled tight behind my back like in COPS.
I need to lose weight. I feel like sexuality has no legitimacy unless you're hot. If you're hot it's sexy, if you're ugly it's just ridiculous. (By "you" here, I mean "me"; I'm being insecure, not assholish.) I would like to lose so much weight that a photo of me naked becomes a filthy picture. I would like to become so hot that I could videotape myself having sex and then enjoy watching it.
And, um, I'd also like a pony.