Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Quiet night.

Last night Sprite and Rowdy and I got together and... pretty much just stayed in. We ate some takeout, exchanged belated Christmas presents (Sprite gave me a huggy dinosaur and Rowdy gave me a subscription to MAKE magazine; I gave Sprite a flogger and Rowdy a robot kit), and then we just hung out. We fucked a little, slept in a big warm pile, fucked a little more and watched Muppet Show clips and cuddled a lot.

Sometimes happiness is just that simple.

It's not much to write about, I guess. But it's kind of... part of what I always wanted for my life. (I might not have always envisioned certain details.) Not to be boring all the time, but to be happy even when it's boring. To be able to have promiscuous public kinky sex with the people I love, and to be able to take a nap with them. And in particular, to take a nap with them and not find myself saying "bleh, you guys aren't any fun unless we're having promiscuous public kinky sex." Love is love and happy is happy, and sex is just the cherry on top. Fuckin' awesome cherry though.

Also: Sprite and I have finally, I think, settled the terminology question of what to call our relationship. We're not really girlfriends with each other. But "my boyfriend's other girlfriend" is cumbersome and indirect. Apparently common poly terminology is "metamour," but eh. Or "paramour," which is kind of clever except it's already a word.

Anyway. We are "sister girlfriends."


  1. Congratulations, it seems you've found the secret recipe of 11 Happily Polyamorous Herbs and Spices. Now shhh, don't go telling everyone or you'll give it away...

  2. I like "paramour", if only because it's a lovely, old-fashioned word. Should be in use more.

  3. Like Svutlana word "paramour" too. Poly terminology "metamour" sound too cold and analytical for me. In Greek meta mean after that combine with amour make metamour sound like leftovers of love. And metamour combine Greek and Latin in for single word. Apparent, this be linguistic no-no...
    How about "sharamour"?

  4. Yay! I really like "paramour" too. I know it technically means something different, but I think we should appropriate it, since there are enough words for "lover" already. In fact....

    (to the bat-blog!)

  5. Jack - The secret is that if you're feeling tired or a little queasy or just not up for sex that particular night, you can always scream "Not me! Do it to Julia!"

  6. Svutlana - Polyamory be combine Latin and Greek roots also.

    I mean, uh... dammit, now you've got me doing it.

  7. Holly,

    Usually in our household that translates as Kerry earnestly suggesting that Kellie might really like the pneumatic rock crusher or whatnot, then running away vigorously.

    As far as our terminology, it pretty much works out to Kerry's Barb, Kellie's Margene, and I don't want a Nikki.

  8. As evidenced by the mighty "polyamory is wrong" t-shirt.

    Incidentally, I suggest "partner in sin", or "codultress". :)

  9. just a head's up... when i hear the phrase "sister girlfriend" all i can think of is sister wives, and that's just unsettling. I would get a very different picture of your relationship if you described yourself as sister girlfriends than if you called her your paramour.


  10. @Jack: But NO ONE wants a Nikki...the writers never seemed to grasp that even the character who's there for the sole purpose of being unlikeable has to have some redeeming traits. :-/

    @latest Anon previous to me: I agree. Now I'm back to one of my favorite pet questions: How do we allow people to marry in poly fashion without making related abuses easier for the small subset of Mormon people who practice them? I still think it has to come down to "Be tougher on child marriage and rape; then you won't have to use polygamy as a proxy for prosecutable behavior."