Hey Sprite, do you have a tampon?"
"Oh, of course, here's one."
"Thanks! We're doing an experiment! We figure that alcohol can absorb in by any mucous membrane, and the vagina is a mucous membrane, so we're going to soak the tampon in rum and stick it in me and see if I get drunk! Also we're curious if it will hurt!"
"...Give me my tampon back."