Sounding.

Phonebuddy Bruce just told me that he uses a sound on himself. I am impressed.

For anyone who doesn't know, a sound is a thin metal rod that a man inserts into his urethra. (NWS and a little queasy: a rather extreme example.) I've heard descriptions of the sensation ranging from "agony" to "an intense orgasm, only in slow motion." I've never heard anyone call it subtle.

I take back every whine I've ever had about doing everything. I've never met Bruce, but between this and his unabashed enthusiasm for being buttfucked (by women! he's not at all bisexual), I desperately want to play with him or someone like him. Something about the idea of a guy being penetrated is hopelessly sexy to me. Maybe because I know what it's like, maybe because I feel like it's more dominating, maybe just because.

I know better than to try to talk a guy into it or (yeek) spring it on him. But one of these days I am going to fuck a man in the ass, and before I die I am going to put a thin piece of metal into a man. I just have to find the guy who likes it. The only one I know is in Chicago, but if there's one thing I know about the human race it's that they're all kinky little bastards in one way or another. (Except Alan. Go figure.)

Someday I'll find my penetration-loving boy, and I'll get my wish. I just want to see the look on his face.

Dialing Chicago.

I've been fucking Bruce longer than Brandon or Jon, but I've never met him. He called me up out of the blue one day and we talked for hours and ended up having phone sex. Bruce was a sweet guy and although I'd never done it before, phonefucking turned out to be great fun. We've been phonebuddies for more than a year now.

It's a very difficult kind of sex. Because there's no way to establish a rhythm, no chance to do the same thing over and over until it works; you have to be constantly thinking of new acts and different scenarios. It's like having to write erotica in real time, with relatively low quality standards but insane speed-of-creativity expectations.

On the plus side, you can lie your ass off. "Oh baby, I got the chicken's entire upper body up there now... ooh, oooh... it's almost stopped thrashing..." Or "yeah, so there I was, thirteen years old, and the cheerleaders told me they were going to 'make me a woman', and then the first one started oiling her forearm..."

It's been a surprisingly intimate experience. Bruce went from telling me how hard he was gonna shove it up my ass to calling me when he needed moral support after crashing his car. We've been following each other's lives as well as sex lives. I know that he likes anal penetration (mine and his! ooh, that's fun) and I also know that he used to be in the Army but now he's studying for a chemistry degree while waiting tables at a steakhouse.

It's amazing how far he's been able to push me physically from two thousand miles away. I experienced my first (dildo) buttsex and my first (self) fisting under Bruce's highly specific direction.

The frequency of our little chats has gone down since I've gotten serious with Brandon and Jon, but it hasn't stopped. Sometimes there's nothing more fun than curling up in bed with the IP phone (no long distance charges!), putting on a big warm bathrobe I will claim to be skimpy lingerie, and dialing Chicago.