A sneaky way to suss out his fantasies
Ask your guy to give you arousing fill-in-the-blank answers, then read him the story. It'll be arousing... and enlightening.
It's ass-fuck time, and we're feeling frisky while at the ice cream truck. Because of a performance I was just in, I'm dressed as Lady Macbeth; for less apparent reasons, you're in a priest's robes. You lean in to me and whisper, "You look even hotter than Madam Curie." Once we're alone, we quickly disrobe for a quick dip in the kiddie pool full of semen. As we're drying off, I take my pseudopod and slowly rub it around your boobies. You lose control and grab an iron and rub it seductively against my gills. In a moment of inspiration, you jump up and go to the refrigerator to grab some semen, then bring it over. I slowly devour it off your pretty blue eyes. We then have wild sex for the length of the Neolithic Age, switching from "the pretzel" to A2M before climaxing simultaneously. Afterward, we file teeth.
I feel aroused... and enlightened.
This? Awesome.
ReplyDeleteThis is still one of the funniest things ever.
ReplyDeleteI think I read this in about four different places (and four different fandoms) on Fanfiction.net. Were you aware you were being plagiarised?
ReplyDelete(Seriously, though, that had me in stitches. Gorgeous.)
My first response: "Oh shit! Give me the links! I'll kick their asses!"
DeleteSecond response: "oh, right... heh. :)"