I have indiscreetly placed obvious bitemarks. Not nibbles. Heavily bruised CHOMPS. I have work soon. I'm doing my best with clothes and makeup, but I'm still not certain whether "I was helping a friend move [his human jaw collection?]", "it's none of your business [that I'm being horribly abused?]" or "it's none of your business *wink* [ewwww?]."
Probably A. I don't like lying when I haven't even done anything wrong, but I also don't like long awkward job-endangering "no, actually things are going GREAT at home" conversations.