Thursday, August 12, 2010

Sleep deprivation.

For some reason being extremely tired makes me horny as all fuck. I'm not sure that I have the wherewithal to actually have decent sex, but when I'm running on 90 minutes of sleep I think about sex more than anything. Certain memories always seem to come up and roll around in my mind when I'm exhausted, and I can feel it in my whole body. I want to have my nipples pinched, I want to be shoved to my knees with a cock stuffed in my mouth, I want come on my face, I want to be bitten and slapped, and I want to be fucked so hard it hurts.

Meanwhile, what I need--and the only thing I'm realistically capable of--is crawling into bed and collapsing.

It's the memories, more than anything. When I'm very tired everything has the flavor of a dream, and memories become immersive, not distant pictures but something I can feel under my skin. The little flashes--a hand holding my hair, a cock between my asscheeks, fingers sliding into my pussy, a mere word a man said to me--are enough to make me flush and shiver.

I almost never have sex dreams. I have a lot of almost-sex dreams: I'll be cuddling with someone, we'll get naked, we'll be talking about sex, and it'll never happen. For whatever reason, when I'm genuinely dreaming I tend to blueball myself. (Also, there are a lot of sharks. Not quite sure why.) But when I'm awake and yet close to sleep, when the membrane of reality has worn thin, just to think of fucking is to experience it.

And I think of fucking a lot.


  1. I work a little differently - as I get more sleep-deprived my mind gets hornier and hornier and then my body says "nope, I not interested in cashing the checks you're writing." My mind doesn't stop, and my fantasies get kinkier, but there's an undercurrent of "yeah, let's arrange that tomorrow. Or maybe next week."

  2. My mom calls that sleep-deprived dreamlike state "civil twilight"...I kind of like it. And it does seem like there's a crack in the usual systems that let's the subconscious and the sensory memories leak through more than usual. I also experience that state when in the half-awake place of post-orgasm coma, just before I am really asleep...I have visual, auditory, tactile flashbacks to odd stuff from my childhood and from the past.

    I also have the almost-sex/blueball type of sex dreams, Holly...sometimes I find them infuriating for that reason! :)

  3. I have a sort of different variation on this. For me, it's not neccesarily sexual. I am unfortunately celibate and gradually becoming really desperate, and, for whatever reason, I seem to have fantasies of holding or leaning together when I get tired. It's gotten to the point where for me just lying or sitting down to rest makes me cuddle-horny.