If you post two "Casual Encounters" craigslist ads in the same city--months apart, at different times of day on different days of the week--you will get responses from the same guys.
The best scenario here is that they've got autoresponders that just spam every w4m with their dick pictures. The worst scenario is that they're really always there, always watching, always trying.
Is it hypocritical that I think posting to Casual Encounters every couple months is totally normal and healthy, but lurking there is super creepy? I don't think it is.
I posted recently to Casual Encounters and was really, really pleased with my results. I mean, I got a lot of obnoxious dick pictures, but I also came away with some great dates and a great NSA situation. There's nothing wrong with posting there, but lurking there is hella creepy, IMHO.
ReplyDeleteAnon - Oh my God the dick pics. Craigslist is proof to me that some guys genuinely don't know at all what appeals to the opposite sex. They send pictures that just make me wonder if they looked at the picture before sending it, ever. I'm not even talking about the wisdom of sending dick pics at all--I'm talking about dick pics that are actively disturbing in their washed-out, greasy-looking, lumpy-looking way. A lot of the time I think it's just an ugly photo rather than an ugly dick, but it makes me wonder if they looked at the photo and said to themselves "yep, that's perfect, show it to the world" or what.
ReplyDeleteIs it hypocritical that I think posting to Casual Encounters every couple months is totally normal and healthy, but lurking there is super creepy? I don't think it is.
ReplyDeleteI think the difference is that if you're posting, you're putting yourself out there, making yourself vulnerable, whereas lurkers aren't doing that.
Also, lurking is less public, so no one sees your creepiness except your target. You have more of a motivation to seem non-creepy in an ad than in a response.
I don't really see the creepiness of lurking, especially since M4W ads on Craigslist get megaspammed by bots and hookers and lovely Russian ladies who need money to come to America. Guys figure if they lurk instead, they'll be more likely to make contact with actual women.
ReplyDeleteI found it creepier when my totally opposite-looking friend and I both put up ads looking for sex and got all the same guys replying. A girl wants to feel like a guy is into her, y'know? Even if it's just for casual sex.
It also underscores how many more men are looking for something casual. I've never responded to a casual ad and rarely respond to dating ads in part because of the perception that my message will get drowned out by hundreds of other guys'.
ReplyDeleteHershele and Bruno - I don't mind guys "lurking" in the sense of responding to ads rather than posting, I just mind when guys give the impression that they lurk all day every day. Posting that often would creep me out equally.
ReplyDeleteI know this is late, but I think that phrase 'we judge others on their actions, but ourselves on our intentions' applies, plus you know you've done awesome cool stuff in between posts, but the only interaction you've had with these guys is Craiglist, so maybe your lizard brain puts the posters in stasis in between posts/emails, instead of putting them on orphan saving missions or what not.
ReplyDelete